By great, I mean huge and heartbreaking. It's been a very difficult week. One of my best friends, Reagan, lost her Dad last Wednesday. He was a wonderful man, and missed his 56th birthday by one day. He was on his way home from a funeral in Arizona with Reagan's mom and another couple, and they were pulled over on the side of the road to fix a flat tire. They were pulled completely off the freeway in a large emergency lane, and standing on the right side of the trunk, opposite the freeway traffic. A driver with his car on cruise control had fallen asleep at the wheel. He woke just before hitting a post and swerved to miss it. Somehow he hit and killed Reagan's Dad, and missed her Uncle standing right next to him, as well as the car with the two women inside. Just like that, within seconds, a careless mistake, many lives affected and crushed. This has brought back so many of the feelings I had when we lost my Dad. The shock, the confusion, the pure, raw sadness. My heart aches even more because I know what the family is going through, and I wish I could take it away from them and give them back their family member. When Reagan called, a couple of hours after finding out herself, I just sat down in the middle of the kitchen and sobbed with her. The kitchen happens to be where we were in my parent's house when we found out our bad news. I fell to the floor that time too. Things like this seem to take the wind out of me and leave me with the inability to stand.
In addition to this horrible news we found out a couple in our neighborhood lost their full term baby an hour after he was born. They had pretty much no warning. The baby seemed fine at the prior ultrasounds, up until the last one where they discovered a heart defect. This hits close to home as well, because we lost my nephew after just a short time like this too. I can't begin to understand or comprehend the loss of a child, and I am reminded how grateful I am for my two healthy girls.
When it comes to losing a father though, as impossible as it seems at the time, life does go on, even if you don't think it should. I can't compare to this experience because it really is so needless and so sudden, but the pain is similar. Three years after our experience I can surely say that time does ease the pain, even for my mom. But for now, it's just a matter of getting by, and being grateful for the time you have with the people you love. So to Reagan I will say, it really does get easier, and for now I'm here for you, and my heart is breaking with you. I love you and I'm so, so very sorry. Your Dad was and is a great man. And to all my family and friends, in case I do not tell you enough, I love you, and I'm so grateful for you. We hear this all the time, but it is so true. Life is certainly too short and unexpected to not tell the ones we love that we love them when we have the chance.
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